Leo Takes a Break at the White Hen Pantry at Roosevelt Road and Halsted Avenue

Leo stands behind the counter, loading hot dogs onto the revolving roaster. He made fifty-four
this past January. He’s a proud South Side Chicago Polock. Not that this has anything to
do with what he’s about to tell you. He just likes saying it because it’s true. He works
at the White Hen Pantry at the corner of Roosevelt Road and Halsted Avenue. Roosevelt Road
connects Chicago’s West side to the Loop and the Near South Side. Halsted Avenue brings the
North Side to the South Side and the southern suburbs. Leo has been working here for eight years, and he’s seen some real wackos and freaks. Not just homeless people, like a lot of people assume, but guys with money, family guys. Even cops—real fruitcakes. Sometimes Leo thinks there are more fruitcakes that people who are sane. He’s been held up more times that he can keep track, once by a guy he knew used to be a fireman. Some junkie is always trying to steal stuff. But that’s normal.
There was a couple comes in and bought some condoms. Leo says he should have known something was up ‘cause the lady picked them out. They paid, and Leo went back to the inventory he was recording. He says he lost track of where they went. A homeless guy who Leo lets wash up in the bathroom sometimes comes up to him and says the door is blocked by something. Not locked because the lock is broken. He couldn’t get inside because something was blocking it. Some boxes or something. And there’s laughing coming out of there. Well, turns out, the couple’s in the restroom. The couple with the condoms are in there, getting their rocks off, and the broad turns out to be a guy. Leo has to admit he punched the guy dressed up as a broad first.